Desire

What am I
In a world where even the soil denies my existence,
A world where I live yet do not exist,
A world where peace and freedom deny me,
A world where “sin” is the word when I smile.
How did I end up here
In a place where even air finds me unrecognizable?

Lost in my careless thoughts,
I looked up at the sky;
My lungs tightened in agony.
How can I breathe easily in a world of despise?
The sky gazed back at me, whispering words that weighed me down;
It screamed three words into my heart: “Good for nothing.”

My craving for a sound grew tall
A sound that sings redemption,
A sound that screams louder than my fears.
Where can I find a sound like that?
I have walked through volcanoes and mountains,
Swum in the coldest rivers to no avail.

The busy streets are filled with laughter;
The animals make sounds to the glory of God.
The choir sings beautiful melodies;
The children run around with wild giggles
Sounds everyone listens to non-stop.

But
Those sounds are silent to me.
All I hear is the panting of my heart,
The silent cries escaping my lungs,
That one voice filled with agony,
The one that shredded my whole into bits.
It echoes so loud.